TK bondservnt[501st] Posted December 9, 2013 Report Posted December 9, 2013 I guess when troopers get to a certain point in their career they start to lose the ones they need the most. my stepmother is on the list. how do you troopers handle the loss of those who you just cannot bear to lose? hearing your input might help us all to understand and keep our minds clear. Quote
Talan Kain Posted December 9, 2013 Report Posted December 9, 2013 Not sure quite what you mean Vern, you are losing your stepmother through illness? Not a trooper yet as I am still on the list for armour but as a normal person who's been through it I don't think you can prepare for it, if it is somebody you don't want to lose then preparation isn't going to help in the slightest, it'll hurt like hell and anyone telling you different is wrong. The pain will heal quicker than you think though and once you have accepted the inevitable you'll view that person you have lost differently, they really are still with you if you remember them, their past advice is still there, you anticipating what they would say and how they would react is still there. If you understood them properly they can still advise you, they do it from your knowledge of how they would act. My grandfather still has a major influence on how I act, him passing 17 years ago makes no difference, my utmost respect for him and my memories of how he acted in certain situations, my knowledge of how he would act in certain situations guides me. In this respect he is still with me and always will be. Quote
pattrooper Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 nobody is ever gone as long as they are in your heart. Quote
walt[501st] Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 Well vern...i feel we have been here to many times....my mothers words come to mine,,,she was taken 12 years ago to cancer,....life is for the living, and life is not ours to understand...it is ours to except.....my prayers are with you Quote
bjsavage7[TK] Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 I'm so sorry to hear that, Vern. I don't believe there really is anything to can do to truly prepare, but simply accept it & grieve in your own way. The hurt will lessen in time. My step mother unexpectedly died about a year and a half ago. I can't explain what I felt, but I went through it in my own way. My father died a long time ago when I was a teenager. I was less prepared for that, but was ultimately happy for him that his long suffering from sickness ended. I know this is little consolation, but if you ever need to talk, you know how to get a hold of me. Quote
captsafe66[Admin] Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 I'm sorry for you loss Vern. I know how loss can hurt, I've lost my daughter, son, Dad and 2 grandparents in the last few years. All I can say is time lessens the pain and they will always be with you. Quote
LadyInWhite[TK] Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 They are with us, just not in mortal form. They speak to us, just not in audible words. They live on in us and through us. They are free of all pain, illness, age, fear, and sadness. They are strengthening our hearts so we can live, enjoy, and appreciate what we have all the more while we are here to enjoy life. The last thing they want is to see us sad, to see us squander life's joys. Grieve - it's important. Then Live. It's even more important. Do all the things that they were afraid to do but wanted to do, the things they admired but felt they couldn't do themselves. Quote
TK bondservnt[501st] Posted December 10, 2013 Author Report Posted December 10, 2013 They are with us, just not in mortal form. They speak to us, just not in audible words. They live on in us and through us. They are free of all pain, illness, age, fear, and sadness. They are strengthening our hearts so we can live, enjoy, and appreciate what we have all the more while we are here to enjoy life. The last thing they want is to see us sad, to see us squander life's joys. Grieve - it's important. Then Live. It's even more important. Do all the things that they were afraid to do but wanted to do, the things they admired but felt they couldn't do themselves. QFT Quote
TK bondservnt[501st] Posted December 10, 2013 Author Report Posted December 10, 2013 this thread is about all who have lost ones. we all share loss in different ways MAY THE FORCE BE WITH US ALL Quote
geronika Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 I lost my father to cancer almost two years ago. I became a stormtrooper to honor his legacy of service to the community. My TK number is his birthday 2-07-36. I miss him everyday. That never goes away. But I know he is with me in spirit everytime I don the helmet. It doesn't make things easier but it helps knowing that I am carrying on the values he taught me. Quote
Tolo[TK] Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 Nobody's gone when they are in you mind. My dad past away 3 1/2 of lung cancer and to this day, I can't get over his passing. But, I've learn to live with it. That is what's helping me going througth this. Sent from my iPhone 5 using Tapatalk Quote
DroidHunter Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 I lost my Mom to cancer on Thanksgiving Day 15 years ago. I was only 29 at the time and she was 55 years young. She battled for about a year and a half, but in the end, there was nothing else that could be done. It took me a long time to get passed that. It took a long time to learn to enjoy the holiday again. She never met my wife or my wonderful children. But time does have a way of taking away some of the pain. It happens a little at a time, but it does happen. As noted above, going through the grieving process is an important part of the healing. Friends and family will help, At the end of the day, you will get through the dark times in the same manner in which you have made it through difficult times in the past. I wish I had some magic advice for you, but I don't. You will get through it. And the pain does subside in time. It's just something you will carry with you, and in some ways it will make you that much stronger. Hang in there Vern. I'll keep a good thought for you and yours. Quote
Red5[501st] Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 Sorry to hear that Vern.. I lost my mother to cancer 20 years ago. Still think of her every day. That's why she's not gone at all. Stay strong! MTFBWY Quote
Echo[TK] Posted December 10, 2013 Report Posted December 10, 2013 I'm sorry for your loss Vern. A lot of wisdom written above. The loss of a loved one is certainly an experience of profound sorrow. While no one can fully know what you are feeling, please take some comfort in our empathy. I loss my father to cancer when I was 19 and since then, over the last 23 years, family, friendship and communities like these have given me the strength and support to heal. Quote
TK bondservnt[501st] Posted December 11, 2013 Author Report Posted December 11, 2013 (edited) I was adopted when my father passed away when I was 2. my actual mother is still alive, but I have lost 2 mothers... and a father... yet I still have one father left to keep me company. he's 85 so he has a lot of wisdom and crankyness still to share. Edited December 12, 2013 by TK Bondservnt 2392 Quote
jkno Posted December 11, 2013 Report Posted December 11, 2013 Family and close friends are the most important in life, they are the loved ones. When they depart a piece of our soul goes with them, but also a piece of their soul remains with us. We will all rejoin beyond the rim. Quote
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